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Amanda Izzo's avatar

This was phenomenal! Unfiltered and raw, I loved every moment!

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Demetria Balfour's avatar

Thank you Amanda!

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Ashes Of Love Poetry 🔥's avatar

That was amazing. You've mastered the art of restraint yourself it seems. Everything felt so precise and anticipated but the reader didn't know what to anticipate. Then the end when they both sort of soften and joke really felt earned. I was reminded that BDSM is a lot more than sex and it ends when the giving of control ends.

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Louis de Clairvoile's avatar

What struck me most wasn’t the ritual itself, but how language becomes its true arena.

Each poem—Frost, Herbert, Gibran—acts as a rung in a descent from form into revelation.

What begins as control turns gradually into devotion; command gives way to confession.

When Dellen reads his own poem, the scene shifts from ceremony to communion.

Power softens, but it doesn’t vanish—it transforms into presence.

Two people who have studied dominance and submission discover that the deeper truth isn’t hierarchy at all, but recognition.

It’s one of the rare pieces that understands this: ritual is only a doorway.

What waits beyond it is not performance, but quiet exposure—

the moment when the hand that gives and the hand that yields become one gesture of faith.

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forthean9uished's avatar

I typically hang out in the poetry realm, but this makes me really want to try my hand at fiction... I appreciated the blend of the two here.

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Demetria Balfour's avatar

Go for it! Your poetry is wonderful, by the way.

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forthean9uished's avatar

Thank you, I really appreciate it 🖤

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El heaven eight's avatar

Is it supposéd to be less intense in the character développement like you wrote yesterday?

🫠🥰You have such a gift!

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Demetria Balfour's avatar

Your encouragement is so kind! So, originally the first two chapters were intended to be standalone scenes of two people simply having kinky intellectual fun. But then my brain went WAY off the rails and started building fully fleshed out characters, and now it’s turned into an entire narrative arc that I am doing my best to honor. 😅 This means some chapters will be slow burn romance, and others will be spicier and more intense. Ultimately, this is a romance told within a D/s framework, with strong erotic threads. Hope this makes sense!

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El heaven eight's avatar

It makes sense and meaning to me! Yes, I am happy with your creative direction!

What a precious gift!

It speaks to aspects in me that are named weird! Ahahah! And.

More specifically kinky, sapiosexuality, poetophilia, metrophilia…

Thank you for making my erotic life

more rich by the minutes spent to read your universe

and that will continue to live in me,

way after I am done!

feeling forward to continue reading tonight!

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AsukaHotaru's avatar

Oh my god this chapter felt like a whole performance ritual wrapped in silk and candlelight. I swear I had to physically pause just to collect myself. The way the tension builds so quietly??? It’s like watching two people breathe their way into worship.

And that poem twist?? Absolutely illegal. I love how it slid the dynamic sideways in the softest, sharpest way. The energy was so… deliberate. Intimate in a way that sneaks up on you.

I’m still thinking about the pacing, the stillness, the breath, the way the room kept expanding and shrinking around them. Honestly it read like choreography — slow, precise, and devastating in tiny doses.

My brain is sitting on that rug still processing.

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Oct 9
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Demetria Balfour's avatar

Aww, thank you! This was the scene where I realized the story was no longer erotica, but rather D/s tinged romance. I really enjoyed laying out the framework for this one.

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